Dear Ex – A Letter

‘The Angry Therapist’ with John Kim – a therapist, is a podcast I follow. I appreciate listening to his honest opinion from his point of view. A great podcast to follow. He also has great content on his Instagram page – follow him there as well.

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I’ve been wanting to share this one for a while and have finally allowed myself to be untied and unbothered by the what if’s of people and this often judgmental world. I tend to overthink things, what people will say, what the ‘ex’ will think, what, what and what. And in sharing this, this is not to ‘stir the pot’ as they say, or dig into something that’s been left in the past. This is for me, no one else, but me. Also, hoping that you can see yourself in this, and can find comfort in this, or if you know someone that can benefit from this letter, so that you may share it as well.

This episode is titled, ‘Dear Ex, I have something to tell you.’ As he mentions, people have feelings for their ex’s – often ill and don’t know how to move forward. Maybe you’re looking for closure – that’s for a whole other post, for now though, here’s a letter to the ex, letting them know – in a healthy way, that you’re ready to wish them well.

‘Dear Ex, I Have Something To Tell You’ episode from

‘The Angry Therapist’ podcast with John Kim

Dear Ex,

Can we share a moment, a new  one? With nothing attached, forgetting everything we were and why things didn’t work. Releasing all judgment and what if’s. Can we share a moment, just one, where I can see you now – today, as a human being minus expectations, ideas of love, what went wrong and the crumbled check list we had peaking from our back pockets. Can we share the fears before we kissed because those felt real. Can we just be without labels, or dissecting dynamics. For one moment, can I experience you without us. Not to spark or reignite anything but to be reminded that we are nothing more than two people who ran towards something they felt but fell. With scrapped knees and a half smile, can we could just look at each other and laugh, knowing we were fools, but also stood on courage, we believed in something and even if it was short lived, that belief is what love is about, not the promise. Can we share a brand new experience based on what is, because the world doesn’t believe we should, because we’re suppose to close our hearts and look straight ahead waiting for someone new, as if love runs out. Because I miss you before we were we.

* This letter doesn’t mean that … I want to be with you again, this doesn’t mean that I want anything from you. This means that I see you as a human being and I acknowledge what we went through and I’m sorry for the pain. This means that I’m letting go of anger, resentment, and things that I’ve been holding on to. This means that the moment that I want to share with you may not be in real time, but it can be now as you’re listening to this. And as you’re listening to this maybe you’re thinking the same thing and if you are, then that’s all I want. Can we respect each other as human beings. Can we know that what happened wasn’t intentional but came from a place of truth at the time and there’s no more bad feelings. There’s no more anger. And I forgive you. And I hope you forgive me. And this doesn’t mean that we need to see each other again. This just means that we shared a bed and that means something. And this means that, just because we are not in each others lives anymore, doesn’t mean that I don’t care about you, or I’m not thinking about you. Not in a way that I want a round two, or a round three, or a round four. In a way that I see you as human and I’m throwing love at you.

Happy Wednesday.

A-

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Mom Life With Chiari

Living with Chiari 1 Malformation and Syringomyelia since 2013.

25 thoughts on “Dear Ex – A Letter”

      1. You are so very welcome Ana. I haven’t written since July, taking a long break as I have had a lot of stuff going on. I am so sorry your body is not cooperating……….it is beyond frustrating when your mind and body are not in sync. Prayers sent up for you today……….

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    1. It is hard. Thank you so much. Schools out starting this week. And it was announced today that they will remain closed until April 15. However the children are being sent the assignments through email. Taking it one day at a time, and praying 🥰🙏🏼
      Hope you’re doing well.

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      1. I just feel weird. Completely disconnected from the rest of my country. But we move on. Keep fighting. Keep looking after our kids. Here they are asking people to avoid social contact but they refuse to close schools. Son has had a bit of a cough so he’s been off. But soon it’s decision time – do I refuse to send him back. My work has completely dried up so I have the time to look after him full time at present. How are you?

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      2. Yes, same here! They’re asking everyone to please stay home and avoid crowds.
        Oh no! I hope they decide to close the schools, at least until the situation gets better. It seems like everyday, more and more stores are temporarily closing their doors. And will continue to pay their employees, which is amazing!
        I’m feeling so tired. My brain, my body, with just too much stimulation, and I get anxious. I shit down. So, I’m trying to take this all, one day at a time.
        The teachers are sending the work, but some have unrealistic exceptions. My son that’s in the spectrum, has been a little overly nervous – as I have been, when his routine gets interrupted, it can get him to not function as he would. You know?! It’s hard on the kids also.
        And you? How are you? Are you working from home?

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      3. Son is super anxious about stuff now. Doing a little work but it’s drying up. Basically no money probably for 2 months but we are lucky, can survive. We just seem to have been cut adrift. School don’t care, the health service has basically dropped him. He doesn’t get any calls from friends. Definitely it’s a shrinking world, But we keep going. We just have to. xx

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      4. Oh I’m so sorry! So sorry!
        Here their providing children hot breakfast and lunch at their schools. So I’m taking the kids to get their meals there – your drive up, grab the meals and eat at home. It’s saving us a ton!
        Can your son call his friend? Does he have their number, because perhaps he can call and speak to them. Just a thought. 😌 But I know what you mean. My son mentioned his friend today. And my heart aches for him. I’m so thankful that he can have someone at school that he can call a friend.
        Absolutely, that’s all we can do. Courage, God provides and He will provide what you need during this time and always. Many hugs!

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    1. Yes, absolutely.
      I’ve struggle with it too. We can move on with our lives, but letting go of the past anger is something many struggle with – including myself. It’s taken me years – years, to finally come to terms with not being ok with the past and wanting to acknowledge it all. Choosing not to ignore my feelings any longer is an amazing place to be in.

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