You Have More Than You Know

Often times it’s easier to dwell and think of all the negatives that are in our lives. I think of my health, of the downward spiral it’s on and it’s so easy to get down, get sad and be a pessimist. The positives isn’t near in sight. But there are positives, to everything, to it all. I’ve often times think of the positives that Chiari and Syringomyelia has brought to my life. It’s allowed me to stay grounded and to live in the moment. I always thought of hospital stays as something foreign. However, having been in the hospital for weeks on end recovering from surgeries brought on by Chiari, it’s given me a whole new outlook on hospitals. There are so many people there, recovering, learning to walk, learning to dress – I was in that position at one point in my life, learning it all – all over again, from learning to walk, to going up and down stairs to learning to move my head from side to side to learning how to dress myself – I was about 28 years old at that time with three littles at home. So many people there feeling lonely, scared, hopeless, frustrated and sad. I’m so thankful to have seen that. It allowed me to see that even though I’m going through something very much valid, there’s also always someone else going through it worse than I am. There are people needing so much more than I do, having a grateful heart for what I have and changing perspective allows me to see what’s right in front of me. Only then is when I realize that I have so much more than I know.

While doing a summer assignment with my oldest son, something stayed with me, it’s from a Swedish folktale titled, “The Laughing Magpie.” The two lines are …

“I laugh because you would rather be sad than fix your own problem.”

Know that you are bigger than any obstacle and any struggle you may be facing today.

“Silly boy, don’t you see that everything you need is right before your eyes?”

If we stop and open our eyes, we can gather the resilience and the inner strength that lies within.

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Photo: Joseph Barrientos

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Mystery Blogger Award – 2

I want to thank my fellow Chiarian blogger over at Simply Chronically Ill for this amazing nomination! There is nothing like getting recognized by fellow bloggers and this amazing soul is phenomenal and her blog is filled with amazing content, her poetry is both thought provoking and intriguing. She also gives tips on how to save and links to great deals! What’s better than saving?! Thank you again and if you haven’t gone to her blog, pay her a visit! I appreciate how these awards allow you to get to know me, they’re fantastic!

Here are my questions for my nominees:

1. If you could cure one disease, what would it be and why?

This here, this here, is a great one! I would find a cure for Chiari Malformation + Syringomyelia – that’s two not one, it’s OK! This thing is both painful and exhausting – find a cure already! I have six babies, SIX, find it now! 😉

2. If you could speak any other language what would it be and why?

Let’s see, my little ones and I speak both English and Spanish and at times I feel it just isn’t enough, so we should definitely try a third! I would speak – and I must thank Google for this, the South Korean dialect of Hanguk. I have Korean descent and would love to dive into something from the culture.

3. If you could do your life over, what is one thing you would change?

Oh wow, this is a bit deep! Although there are times – many, many, many times, where I think my life made a wide turn – or wrong turn, into what I thought wasn’t in my ‘plans’ I am a firm believer of how things change, people change and my life changed for a reason. I have chronic pain and an illness that in 2018 – today, has no cure, and although at times it may seem unfair, unbearable or frustrating, there is nothing God would allow in my life that I wouldn’t be strong enough to bear. 🙏🏽

4. What is one word you wished you heard more often?

Hello. Can we get a simple ‘hello?!’ How hard is that?! It’s often forgotten and dismissed as something that’s not important. I think a simple hello has the power to change someones day, to brighten someones day, to transform an inner most feeling someone may be having on that particular day. Maybe you’ve gone somewhere, entered a room or simply thought of someone but didn’t have the thought or courage of following through – because your excuse is always not having the time, say hello, send a hello to someone, to a friend, to a family member, hell to your spouse that woke up before you saw him/her leave the house! Send them a message and say, hello! So simple, yet so thoughtful and TRUST they’ll appreciate it! Amazing.

My nominees are:

My Li’l Place

Searching For My Inner Zen

Magic In The Everyday

Dorky Mom Doodles

The Godly Chic Diaries

Pink Herald

Mrs. Mother Dirt

Ramblings Of A Wonky Girl

Thank you and you’re welcome, to my nominees for participating. You and your blog are fantastic and deserving of this award – I can’t wait to read your answers!

Here are my questions for my nominees: 

1. If you could cure one disease, what would it be and why?

2. If you could speak any other language what would it be and why?

3. If you could do your life over, what is the one thing you would change?

4. What is one word you wished you heard more often and why?

Thank you Simply Chronically Ill for these questions, they’re great!

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Release The Pressure

I don’t often watch television, but do have some programs set on the DVR. On some days when the time is just right, I’ll watch something live – today was one of those days. I’ve not only been a little on edge because of last weeks visit to the ENT  but also feel at times overwhelmed, I’m the one people come to for comfort or to be heard – not that it’s a bad thing. My therapist once told me, it’s a good thing to listen to someone speak about their own struggles because at times it can give you a sense of comfort knowing that you are not alone. Can I remind you of the quote, ‘misery loves company’? Yes, sometimes within my own ‘misery,’ I like to find someone else who’s living within the same miserable state. It makes me feel less alone, ultimately, less miserable. It’s helpful! But it can be hard to be present in someones else’s life when I have ongoing health issues – not to mention the biggest one of them all, Chiari. I do it of course! However, I lend an ear out of respect because I’ve been sought after, but would I rather be doing something else, absolutely!

“Do not become the 911 in everybody’s life, just stop and release yourself of the pressure.”

– Steve Harvey

As the little ones took their afternoon nap, today I was able to watch the Steve Harvey Show. He’s funny, he’s witty and one of the few adults with wisdom. Yes, I’m that person that believes age doesn’t always equal wisdom. So, today the topic of ‘releasing the pressure from yourself’ came up. That was music to my ears folks! Yes, yes! Do you have that friend or family member that only calls when they need you, when they need something from you, when they need you to do something for them? Do you feel responsible to help them, to be there for them, to do what they’ve just asked you to do? Yes, I’m there, I have those! So, he was saying to take the pressure off from the need to be there for them. It’s not in a condescending way – no! It’s for yourself, do this for you! ‘You are only responsible for your children. If the person is not your child, then you are not responsible for them and you are welcome to take the pressure off yourself!’ He brought a point we too often forget and a good point at that, ‘if they didn’t have you, what would they do?’ So, he also recommended you stop receiving their calls, because all their calls tend to be for ‘requests’ and if you can, to stop listening to your voicemails, because 95% of the time voicemails are ‘requests’. They will leave that voicemail saying, ‘call me, it’s important.’ I couldn’t help but laugh, because it true! It’s so true! If you’re not laughing, maybe it’s because you’re the other person. Eek! I often think, wait, I need to answer or I need to listen to the voicemail because, what if it’s an emergency?! Here’s what Mr. Harvey said, ‘all emergencies or problems pass within 24 hours’ and encourages that you ‘don’t become the 911 in everybody’s life, just stop and release yourself of the pressure.’ And I think, if it were an actual emergency, they’d be calling 911 – not you.

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One of my children’s movies comes to mind and it says it best, ‘sit down before you hurt yourself!’ We put so much pressure on ourselves to be in everyone else’s lives, we forget to be present in our own. And I am a firm believer on how stress and anxiety can may very well be the culprit of the way you feel, this pressure makes you sick – literally. I don’t know why I needed to hear that today, but I’m so glad I did, some reassurance is good and always welcomed!  It’s good to put me/you first and not feel remorseful for it.

Happy day!

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